Nearly eight months after news first broke that the L would be shut down extensively, the MTA is making the plan official.

Who needs a mantra when you can just repeat “please allow additional travel time” while kicking stuff as you text your friends, family and boss telling them you’re going to be late to every single goddamn thing you have planned for this weekend?

SPONSORED- Is winter getting you down, Bushwick? Are thoughts of the L train shutting down for 3 years giving you anxiety? Well don’t tell your real mom about it- real moms suck! The person you need to talk to is Nina Keneally, aka The World Famous NeedAMom

Have you already banged your ugly roommate because the L train is really annoying on the weekends? Well, call that ugly romance quits because Uber will give you a ride along the L for a mere subway fare

“Nothing is forever,” Brooklyn-based artist Vexta says when discussing street art’s temporary life span

Are you still drudging aimlessly through the start of fall? Confused about whether this is an Indian Summer or a Mild Winter? Not sure whether to consult a Farmer’s Almanac or NOAA? Not quite sure which Thursday of November Thanksgiving falls on, and which Tuesday is election day? Have you already started thinking about your Christmas list? Well, put your pants back on, people, and get your head in the game: Halloween is almost here