Edgy. What is even edgy? When was the last time you used it in day to day conversation? The questionable adjective makes me recall a very memorable episode of Daria during which a pretentious reporter Val from magazine for teens Val visits Daria to do a story about her. Val, well into her thirties, keeps using the word edgy to demonstrate her belonging to the cool part of the population. It didn’t work. And it doesn’t work below either…
Recently, we found ourselves bombarded with Bushwick-branded products from all over the Internet varying from clothing items to bulbs and even free blogging themes. Here’s 10 of them in different range of absurdity, edginess and actually some of them we don’t even mind…
#1 North Face Men’s Bushwick Bomber Jacket for $298.95 (sold on Moosejaw)
Description from the manufacturer: FEATURES of The North Face Men’s Bushwick Bomber Jacket Bomber-style – 550-fill down hooded jacket with waterproof construction Front zip with hidden snap placket Detachable faux fur at fixed hood Center front zip with hidden snap placket Zip hand pockets.
We say: This jacket actually looks pretty good. Taking into account how freakishly brutal can New York winters be, we shall not refrain from being snarky here. Yes, we all need a good heavy winter jacket especially with lotsa furr on the hoodie!! The price is kinda steep but during Polar Vortex, we’d probably pay that.
#2 Kelsi Dagger Brooklyn Bushwick Duffel Bag for $198 (sold on Urban Outfitters)
Description from the manufacturer: Chic duffel bag from Brooklyn-based Kelsi Dagger Brooklyn crafted in premium pebbled leather with zip accents along the carry handles. Spacious, zippered, lined main compartment with two slit pockets and a zip pocket. Finished with an adjustable shoulder strap. Brooklyn-based brand Kelsi Dagger prides itself on creating accessories with a heritage soul and a modern edge in relaxed, classic shapes and hues.
We say: Upper East Side girl with a Bushwick bag? Does this concept ever work?
#3 Stance Socks Men – Bushwick for $12 (sold on resoul.com)
Description from the manufacturer: Stance creates outstanding socks with the best fit and performance characteristics from the highest quality materials. The outward facing personality of the brand and their products are the creative and artistic stories that go into every single sock made. Designed in San Clemente, worn everywhere.
We say: This Bushwick-branded shopping list just got kinda weird (but keep scrolling it gets weirder, we promise). Really Bushwick socks, moreover designed in California? But at least it’s an useful item.
#4 Bushwick WordPress Theme for free
Description from the manufacturer: Bushwick is a lightweight, responsive blogging theme, designed to showcase beautiful content alongside beautiful imagery.
We say: If you ever decide to get a WordPress blog, you can now use a free theme for it, which bares the name of our beloved nabe. Yes, Bushwick. How random. No matter where we look, I don’t see any Bushwick connection whatsoever.
#5 Bushwick Racers Tee for $30.99 (sold on 6pm.com)
Description from the manufacturer: Satisfy your need for speed with this retro Tailgate® tee. Distressed screen print gives the soft cotton tee a vintage vibe.
We say: This tee does not come with the dude, ladies!
#6 Vans OTW Bushwick (Leopard Camo) Black/Mint Skate Sneakers Shoes for $59.97 (sold on Amazon)
We say: Vans shoe designers must be kicking it in Bushwick to have come up with this name! This takes us back, way back to days spent hanging by our lockers and watching our crush walk by in his/her vans on the way to class. While life in Bushwick is nothing like grade school, these sneaks will slip in a little nostalgia on the pavement of these ever-changing streets.
#7 Bushwick Vintage Edison-type 40W Bulb ST58 – 4 Pack for $28 (sold on Amazon)
We say: Just between us… One Bushwick bar owner whose name we shan’t reveal confirmed that any bar that opens in Bushwick and has any other bulbs than these particular Bushwick bulbs, shall fail miserably! Apparently, Bushwick peeps require this particular kind of lightning. Is it true, Bushbabies? Are you truly such bulb snobs? Confirm or deny in the comments, please!
#8 Black Apple Bushwick Faux-Leather-Sleeve Denim Jacket for $99.99 (sold on Urban Outfitters)
Manufacturers description: Edgy destroyed denim jacket topped with quilted faux-leather sleeves and a button-down front placket from Black Apple. Complete with a pointed collar, flap/zip chest pockets, angled side pockets and finished with a logo patch at the chest.
We say: Blah blah edgy blah blah Bushwick
#9 Kelsi Dagger Brooklyn Bushwick Peep-Toe Ankle Boot for $99.99
Description from the manufacturer: Heeled peep-toe bootie in rich suede, from the folks at Kelsi Dagger Brooklyn. Propped up on a stacked block heel and finished with pull-zip closure down the side.
We say: Fall is upon us, so strut yourself down Morgantown catwalk! Keep peeping (your toes) as long as you can before the snow and slush take over Bogart, Bushwick Ave and beyond…
#10 McKibben + Bogart Candle for $81
Manufacturer’s description: The Bushwick candle is inspired by the Brooklyn neighborhood in the early 2000′s: wood, oil, paint thinner, incense, ICR vs Deth Killers of Bushwick and artist lofts. Scent highlights include terpentic notes of drying oil paint on canvases blended with incense, dry cedarwood chips, and dark gualac wood oil.
We say: Ah, the famous Bushwick candle! OAK outdid themselves when they tried to persuade the word that something, which is by definition stinky can give a pleasant scent to your home. They named the candle after tré Bushwick stylish intersection which features tré stylish cement factory. OAK you win this contest of the most absurd Bushwick-branded items. We bow.