Official flyer of Wet Hot Brooklyn Summer

Forget about whatever bullshit you had planned for next Tuesday because you don’t need it. Make it your beeswax to be at X Marks The Lot (39 Knickerbocker Ave, East Williamsburg) on August 4, 2015 at 5:57PM sharp for a Wet Hot Brooklyn Summer talent show, as part of Brooklyn Renaissance’s Open Mic series.

We’re all adults here, and I think you can all be there. But, don’t forget to leave your stupid adult clothes at the door because this event requires your whimsical imagination and effort in putting together a costume. Seek inspiration from the characters of Wet Hot American Summer, or, as the event’s Facebook page suggests, channel your summer camp look circa 1981. Ask one of your wet hot friends to help spruce you up. Maybe bring a stick of gum in case things get hawt.

Besides the totally sweet talent show, look out for:

~bbq sauce for smearing all over your face before necking with your lover + stuff to put it on!

~screenings of our favorite movie, Wet Hot American Summer (duh)

~Science projects (learn more than saying “Space The Final Frontier”)

~Artsy fartsy crafts (feel free to bring anything but the brown crayon, because that’s all they’ll have JUST KIDDING)

~Mud (for smearing on your ass)

~Finally being able to talk in WHAS quotes with your fellow Wet Hot lovers

~A food drive with Rock Can Roll: bring your favorite “canned guru”

~FREE BEER : A White IPA and Bushwick Pilsner by Braven Brewing Company & Wet Hot American Wheat Ale by Finch’s Beer Company

~ And more!

X, X, X Marks The Lot (photo via Wet Hot American Talent Show Page)

The event will honestly resemble what your wildest dreams have been since the movie aired on July 27th, 2001–being a camper at Camp Firewood.

Additionally, a couple former starlets from the movie will be making an appearance. Anybody remember Tall Debbie as the “Friends Girl” in the talent show? Well, Michelle Joni is her real name, and when the movie aired back in ‘01, Michelle was the only camper cast from the actual Camp Towanda (with the exception of the camp director’s son, Roger the Master Broom Balancer) which makes her the bee’s knees/the coolest. Her little sis Jessica joined the fun as well back then as a talent show audience member, so she’ll obviously be holding down the audience member thing, but also, yes, sharing some re-enactments.  Jessica is now part of an independent fashion design collective in NYC called Tilly And William.

I know you’re wondering, and the answer is YES–the wiseass Alan Shemper will yet again be spinning those classic jokes we just can’t stop laughing about as host of the talent show, played by NYC comedian Zach Garner.

And that’s not all

Before you start singing Kenny Loggins’ “Danny’s Song” all the way to Tuesday, daydreaming about how awesome Wet Hot Brooklyn Summer will be, lend me your ears, or, excuse me, eyes:

Talent Show Auditions on Instagram

Would you like to be part of the amazing talent show? Post a video (or photo, if that’s all you really think you need) on the ‘gram by tagging #wethotbrooklynsummer #audition. Deadline is Sunday, August 2.

According to the rules, your talents may be your twist on the Wet Hot American Summer Talent Show acts, and they also may be made up, or they may have nothing to do with the movie at all.

Thanks, Netflix, for reviving the rowdy cult classic and reminding us how much we love everything about Wet Hot American Summer (BTW, the prequel airs this Friday July 31, for all you Netflix subscribers).

Now, don’t forget to bring a few sticks of gum for you and your wet hot soulmate on Tuesday. Until next week, campers.

Wet Hot Brooklyn Summer is happening on Tuesday, August 4 at 5:57 PM until midnight.  Located at X Marks The Lot, 39 Knickerbocker Avenue.  Grab tix here.